Dear Editor,

The HAUNTED house at Eagle Valley State Park

It all started with a stack of pumpkins, a bag of candy, and a wagon ride down a dirt road. “It’ll be fun,” they said. So I began to eat my Snickers fun-size bar.

We passed some hanging ghosts with a sign that said, “Keep Out!” That was good enough for me — turn this wagon around! — but we kept going. We pulled up to this old house and I was thinking, it’s time to go back home, but I must be brave. We enter the old, stone house and the mistress of the place says no cell phones or touching the actors otherwise bad things will happen. I heard screaming and banging and I was the one to go in first. We all entered a room with a creepy girl saying she has lost her father and she points to the narrow passage we need to travel.

So off we go, it was me, Joe, two ladies and a guy in a mask holding a hatchet. At one point, I heard screaming behind us and Joe said, “let’s wait for the others”, are you freaking kidding me, do you know what happens when you wait for those lagging behind in a haunted house? I’m pretty sure the guy with the axe can take care of himself. All I have is a purse full of candy. I’ll use it if I have too.

We enter into this room and there’s four black robed individuals with bird beaks. Not sure if they were human or not and I slide along the back wall trying to blend in with the darkness. All was going as planned till one took off their mask and I was A puff of smoke. The witch was waiting for me in the next room, cackling and brewing her spider, brew. I wanted to show her that I had a bigger spider necklace around my neck but decided it was best to leave her to her stirring. I entered a room with corpses hanging in white bags like deer carcasses hanging in a cooler. If one of them reaches out and grabs me, I’ll have a coronary right there. Good thing I updated my beneficiaries.

I get through the bags and the butcher is waiting for me with a big, bloody, knife. He’s cutting up a body, He growls at me and I snarl back, showing my chocolate covered teeth. I forget to tell him his daughter is looking for him as I run out the back door to the arms of flesh eating zombies. You know how women always fall down in their high heal boots in the movie? Not this girl, I was running to the wagon, yelling to the wagon master, start the engine.

If you missed out on this amazing adventure, I cannot tell you what awaits you in the dark next year. #hatsofftoBenandLaura, #jobwelldone, #scaredthebeejususoutofme

Mary Baker-Grant Stansbury PK, UT/Pioche NV